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| so, this summer... i bought my first real six-string! bought it at the five and dime.
not really. good song, though. (i have broken out my six-string, for the first time in months. it took a while to get over that, but i did. and i have been playing more lately. not until my fingers bled.)
what i have been doing is working (previously four days a week, but now three). the rest of the time...
gardening! i am still waiting for my zuccs to really come in. i'm banking on the late northwest summers.
dehydrating! i got a food dehydrator on craigslist and i have been drying tomatoes like there's no tomorrow. i've been eating them like there's no tomorrow too, so i've broken about even.
cannnnning! i picked 4 cups of blackberries from the neighbor's bush and earned myself a number of flesh wounds in the process. then i needed to do something to keep them all from going bad so i enlisted mikey and wessie and we made JAM! four kinds, to be exact: blueberry, blackberry, triple berry, and a strawberry orange marmalade. 24 jars in total. it was miraculous.
missing people! all of you who are far away.
and finally talking to some of you! finally got a thirty-second skype session in with tracy, plans to talk to laura and liz soon. after they've fallen off the face of the earth, it should be wonderful.
vacation! went to vancouver, wa on the train to meet lu and mary there and have a great time hanging out and house hunting. as always with that bunch, hilarity ensues.
reading! finished animal, vegetable, miracle. and read choke on the hottest day ever in seattle. and now i'm rereading stranger in a strange land, because i miss you boys. also rewatching firefly and making enrico watch with me, partly for the same reason.
carpentry fun! fixing my bed which was sagging immensely in the middle by adding a support beam. and now i'm starting a litter-box hutch for birdie. it will be an adventure, surely full of splinters.
with all of this fun stuff i have learned some things. like, i have learned things about forgiveness, and saying sorry, and moving forward while simultaneously living in the moment. and about gardening, canning, and carpentry!
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| so this weekend was very different from how i have been thinking it would be for a long time. some plans i had to travel changed, and i ended up with a conundrum: what do i do with my six days off work now that i have nowhere to go? i searched for cheap last minute flights to anywhere, considering joining bobby in amsterdam (but tickets were over two grand) or going on a solo long weekend to maui. after realizing that going anywhere worth going would break my bank account, i was presented with a beautiful plan c, a weekend trip to the san juan islands. so on monday, planning begins. enrico and i bully mikey and katrina into coming with us, we pull off a thursday night trip to puyallup to gather camping gear, we make a reservation at the last campsite available on the island and stop at safeway on friday morning to get marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate bars (aka the essentials).
the weekend was an amazing retreat to a beautiful place with great people. i couldn't imagine a better way to spend three days.
it entailed!:
wind in my hair
alpacas
a short hike in english camp
a breathtaking sunset + a bottle of cava
four people sleeping under the stars
two people sleeping in a one-person tent
a day at the beach (with real sand!)
being buried in aforementioned sand
and then attempting to rinse off in 42 degree waves
chocolate fondue over a coleman camp stove (once i figured out how to jerry-rig a double boiler)
ice cream x2
cherries from a tree
ridiculous conversations
and amazing memories.
<3
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| wow. i am elated. how did i get this way? it's summer. i hung out with great people. i resolved some problems, above and beyond. i played in the dirt, climbed onto a roof, and i have tomorrow off work.
hedonism!
i am lucky or blessed, or some combination of the two.
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| i was thinking about people today. people who have played a part in my life and all that fun stuff. who've changed me.
anyway, there are infinite things from infinite people. i suppose these are the more definitive. you can try to guess who you are, but i think you'll have trouble figuring it out exactly, because you all are so much more.
you are the reason i play with tools, bugs, and things that are unsanitary.
you are the reason i play in the kitchen.
you are the reason i know when to tickle
and you are the reason i know when to stop.
you taught me how to fall in love
you taught me how to stay in love
you taught me how to be in love.
you are the reason i have music
and you are the reason i have religion
and you are the reason i have hope.
you told me that feelings should never be invalidated, and i try to live by that;
you said that friends are forever, and you proved it.
you showed me how to grow up,
you made me want to stay young.
you showed me how to ask questions and dive in.
you showed me what it means to be loyal.
you taught me to put myself first sometimes,
and yet you put others first all the time.
you pointed out that i chew food oddly
and i am a know-it-all
and a big, big klutz
but for some reason that seems to work for us.
you drove me crazy and forced me to learn how to choose,
and i am all the better for it.
you taught me how to apply makeup.
you told me i never had to wear it. (and i usually don't.)
you showed me how to be vulnerable
and you taught me to keep my mouth shut (but i'm still working on that one).
you showed me that we are the sum of our parts, and more.
you told me that i am enough.
i don't know how it is that i am surrounded by people like you and i am still so utterly clueless. thank you all, for prodding me in the right direction.
[hello, senior year...]
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| i am exhausted. i am sitting amidst boxes, ones that never had lids and rolls of packing tape couldn't contain. the cat keeps escaping and i drank too much last night.
this is where you start over. if we were strong enough, it would happen every day. how weak are humans, that we need eves and physical relocation and all of the rest to slap ourselves in the faces and say, "wake up! the past has happened! embrace the present and the future which will become the present!"
i need a shower. (this one has good water pressure and heats up quickly and the ceiling doesn't mold.)
happiness is always a choice, and i, for one, am saying yes.
[i am lucky to have the emotional support and physical strength of some amazing people. thank you all for helping me make the move.]
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